


The Tale of the missing colander

by RJW



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Coming Out, Confessions, M/M, Teenage Drama, Tyrus is Endgame, post-episode 3x13
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-19
Updated: 2019-03-19
Packaged: 2019-11-25 21:02:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18171434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RJW/pseuds/RJW
Summary: Leslie Goodman is standing in her kitchen. One kitchen item is missing. What could be the tale behind the missing colander?





	The Tale of the missing colander

**Author's Note:**

> Can be read as a prequel to 'Dear Cyrus'. In that little fic I made Cyrus write to TJ that he had had such a hard time explaining to his mother what he had to use the colander for. Naturally, that got me thinking... This is the result. I hope you enjoy it!

Leslie Goodman was standing in the middle of her kitchen, annoyance visible on her face. You could probably fault her for a few things in her life (she was aware of her own weaknesses, she was a therapist after all), but having a cluttered kitchen was not one of them. Every item in her kitchen had its own spot, so you were able to get it directly when needed. No one in her household was allowed to even go to bed at night, in case of an untidy kitchen. Kitchens had to be organized and clean. A cluttered kitchen is a cluttered mind, she more than once stated. But now, her universe was disrupted, hence the annoyance at this particular moment. One item was clearly missing. Above the sink was a rack situated, with six hooks hanging down from it, and three bowls and one pot sitting on top of it. One of the hooks was empty. It was the one between the hook where the skimmer was hanging, and the one that was occupied by the spatula. Where on earth could the item be? How long ago did it disappear? Did she put in the wrong place?

To be clear, Leslie considered herself a modern woman. She was a hard working therapist, and belonged to a group of highly esteemed psychiatrists. She got married, divorced, and married again, and tried to divide her time equally between her job and her family. She raised her son to be open minded, and to stay away from gender stereotypes. Still, she was the one that was responsible for the kitchen, and for cooking dinner. She more than once stressed to other people that it was a Leslie-thing, not a woman-thing. Luckily, Todd didn’t have any interest in cooking at all, so he didn’t get in her way, or make his own ideas about the kitchen’s organization. Her ex-husband Norman however used to be a fanatic baker. To state that having flower, pots, bowls, whisks, baking trays and opened-up packages of butter all over the place in the kitchen were the cause of the divorce, would be a bit too strong. It didn’t help to improve the relationship however, that’s for sure.

After Leslie had checked the dishwasher, all the cupboards, and even the fridge (maybe an early-stage dementia was to blame), she leaned against the counter, feeling defeated. Not once before did she loose a kitchen item. She couldn’t wrap her head around it, and the cursed empty spot on the rack was bugging her so much, she couldn’t get herself to just forget it for the moment, and make herself a cup of tea. So naturally, when her son entered the house, looking utterly unhappy, and simply walked up to rack, hanging up her missing colander after which he walked away only saying a mumbled “hey mom”, she felt lost for words, and frozen in her spot for a couple of moments.

Only after she heard footsteps going up the stairs, her mind seemed to have processed the situation, and she hurried to the stairs, calling after her son.  
“Oi! Get back down here!”

Cyrus yelled back from around the corner upstairs. “I want to crash on my bed, and I have homework to do!”

“Well, those two don’t go together very well. Come down now, you have some explaining to do!”

Standing in front of his door. Cyrus took a deep breath. He really only wanted to lie on his bed, and maybe cry for a bit. He didn’t feel like wanting to explain the situation at all. It had been a bad idea from the start to borrow a kitchen item without asking, he was aware of that. But it was for TJ, and he just couldn’t deny him, did he?

“Do I have to?”, he said.

“Yes. Now!” It was a bit out of character to yell at her son, and to be so strict with him, but all those years of parenting and being a therapist had taught Leslie to spot something wrong with her son’s mood from miles away. She felt determined to find out what was bugging her son, and in the meantime of course, what had happened to her colander.

Cyrus descended from the stairs, his shoulders hanging, and followed his mother back into the kitchen. Leslie looked at her son in worry, as she noticed the boy didn’t want to look her in the eyes.

“Now then, what on earth were you doing with my colander?” she asked.

“O, nothing.”

“You took the colander to do nothing with it?”

Cyrus sighed. “No, I had to use if for salt.”

“But…, what? What do you mean you had to use it for salt?”

“It was a costume. I was salt.”

“A costume? What kind of a costume is ‘salt’”?

“A shitty one where you have to wear a colander on your head. Can I go now?”

Leslie looked at her son as if he had become insane. “No! Maybe you think you’re explaining this, but excuse me, I can’t make any sense out of this. You wore a colander on your head?”

“Yes I did.”

“And I assume someone else was ‘pepper’?”

“No, no pepper.”

“You decided to do a costume by yourself, and to dress up like salt.”

“No, someone else wanted to do a costume with me.”

“Then who?”

Cyrus hesitated. Answering the question would possibly open up a can of worms. But he decided lying about it to be no option, as he was a bad liar, and his mother would spot it immediately. Maybe giving away as little information as possible was the best option.  
“TJ”, he simply said.

“TJ? Isn’t he the taller boy? The one that brought bread during shivah?”

“Yep”, Cyrus answered.

“So you did a costume together with TJ?”

“Nope”, Cyrus answered, popping the ‘p’.

Leslie closed her eyes for a moment. Her son was making no sense at all. But she was determined to get to the bottom of it.

“Okay, let me get this clear. You dressed up as ‘salt’, because TJ wanted to do a costume with you that’s not ‘pepper’, and then you didn’t do it?”

“More or less. He wanted to dress up as summer.”

“He dressed up as summer? How do you dress up as summer?”

“I don’t know. He didn’t dress up as summer in the end.”  
Cyrus was fully aware that it could take a while to explain everything, but the truth was, he didn’t want to explain anything at all. He just wanted to go to his bed and be sad. Leslie wasn’t someone to give up that easily, however.

Leslie sighed. “So TJ didn’t dress up like summer, but wanted you to dress up like ‘salt’?”

“That’s correct.”

“So did you do a costume together or not?”

“No, I was Mount Rushmore.”

“What? How can you be Mount Rushmore wearing a colander? What has salt to do with Mount Rushmore?”

“Nothing. Andi needed a Thomas Jefferson, so I helped her.”

Leslie perked up. “O wait! Wait! I got this one! So you asked TJ to be Thomas Jefferson of course! Am I right?”

Now it was Cyrus’ turn to be completely confused by the conversation. “Sorry what? Why would I ask TJ to be Thomas Jefferson?”

Leslie’s face fell. “Thomas Jefferson? TJ? The initials? That can’t be a coincidence.”

Cyrus frowned. He didn’t spot that. It had been a coincidence. “No, no, _I_ was Thomas Jefferson!”

“O… Which president was TJ then? Roosevelt?”

“No, Marty was Roosevelt. TJ wasn’t a president.”

“Marty? Who’s Marty?”

“O, he’s from the party.”

“Party, what party? Did you go to a party? Were you dressed up as Mount Rushmore at a party? Or were you wearing the colander at that party?”

“No, no, no, you’re mixing things up! The party was a long time ago.”

“I’m mixing things up? Maybe you try to be a bit more sensible here. So you didn’t do a costume together with TJ, and you were Thomas Jefferson. What was he dressed up like then?”

“He was dressed up as ‘dribble’”, Cyrus said, cringing thinking back at it.

“Dribble? Now what’s dribble? That’s not a president, nor is it related to salt, or summer.”

“No it’s related to an other dribble. Then you get ‘double dribble.”

“Okay, and what’s ‘double dribble’?”

“I don’t know, some rule in basketball.”

“And to be clear, you had nothing to do with this ‘dribble’?”

“No, I was going to be salt, and then I was Mount Rushmore. Some girl was the other dribble.”

Again, Leslie needed some time to collect her thoughts. It felt like carving out a statue with a toothpick. Her motherly intuition started to kick in, and somehow she got a small idea in her head of what could be the bigger picture. “I’m guessing here that you weren’t that happy with the dribble-situation?”

Cyrus just shrugged, looking at the ground.

“Okay dear, shall I make us some tea first? Then you can try to explain me some more, because I don’t want you to be sad, and I can only help you if you tell me why you’re moping.”

“I’m not moping” Cyrus mumbled.

“Yes you are dear. Now then, tea?”

“Yes please” Cyrus continued mumbling. He should have known his mother wouldn’t rest until she figured out the whole story. He wasn’t sure how he felt about sharing everything, though.

A couple of minutes later, mother and son were seated at the kitchen table, enjoying their tea. Leslie broke the silence. She tried to sound more supportive, as that’s what she had figured was what Cyrus needed the most by now.

“Now honey, can we go back a bit in the rather insane conversation we had earlier?”

Cyrus nodded his head hesitantly.

“I’ll take that as a yes. So if I understand correctly, TJ asked you to do a costume together where you were dressed up as salt, and he as summer. Am I right?”

“Yeah…”

“Can you explain to me why that combination makes one costume?”

“It’s an inside joke between the two of us,” Cyrus said softly, holding his cup with both hands. “It’s summer-salt. You understand? Summersault, as in gymnastics.”

Leslie looked confused. “Since when are you into gymnastics?”

“I’m not. I told TJ once I couldn’t do a summersault, and he was determined to teach me.”

“O…, and did you succeed?”

Cyrus was smiling at the thought, he couldn’t help himself. “Yeah…, he was really patient and supportive. He took me to the gym where he works. It’s a children’s gym. He didn’t give up until I could do one.”

“He sounds like a nice friend. He’s your friend right?”

Cyrus didn’t need time to answer that question. “Yes he is. He’s nice to me. He’s different from Buffy and Andi. They’re always really protective over me, as if I’m not able to stand up for myself, as if I’m not my own person. TJ isn’t like that. He has been nothing but supportive towards me, and he always listens to me when I’m rambling along bout something silly. And he makes me feel appreciated, and… worthy of myself, I guess.”

Leslie was looking at her son with a knowing smile. It did not escape her that Cyrus eyes had lit up talking about TJ, and that her son wasn’t able to suppress a smile. “Hm, I remember him when he was here for the shivah. He’s a pretty handsome boy, don’t you think?”, she asked, almost sounding casually.

Cyrus almost choked on his tea. “Mooom”, he whined. But he realized the damage had been done. He felt his cheeks burning and radiating a shade of bright red. There was no going back from this. “Yes…, he’s pretty handsome”, he whispered to the table.

“Aha, we agree on this one then. Do you like him?”

Cyrus swallowed away the lump that he felt in his throat. He felt his eyes filling up with tears. There was no way back. It was time to jump off the cliff, into the unknown. He felt scared and insecure. With his teary eyes, he raised his head, looking at his mother. “Mom…” he said sniffing, “I’m gay.”

Cyrus couldn’t register anything after saying that. It was as if his brain went on standby-mode. For a moment he didn’t see, hear or feel a thing. He was brought back to reality by two arms wrapped around him, and the familiar smell of his mother close to him. “O honey, it’s okay” he heard whispering in his ear. And that was all it took for him to start sobbing on his mother’s shoulder like a small child. Leslie held her son close to her until he stopped sobbing. She leaned back to look him in the eyes. “It’s really okay dear” she said reassuringly, “You can’t control your feelings, and you can love whomever you want.”

Cyrus wiped his tears away, trying to get it together again. “Thanks mom” he whispered still sniffing.

As Leslie got back on her own seat, she smiled at her son. “I’m not sure if this is something you’re happy to hear, but to be honest, I’m not really surprised.”

Cyrus looked back at her in confusion. “You’re not?”

“No honey. For years you spend time with two beautiful girls, and nothing ever happens. And you also weren’t very subtle when it came to your friend Jonah, you know. Do you have any idea how differently you looked at him than at the girls?”

Cyrus felt himself getting a bit uncomfortable. “Am I that obvious?”

“To me you are”, Leslie said still smiling brightly. “So…, TJ huh?”

Her son huffed. “Yes, I like him, but he doesn’t like me back, so much is obvious.”

“O, I’m not so sure, from what you’re telling me. Does he know you’re gay?”

“God no!”, Cyrus exclaimed. He was far too worried to lose TJ as a friend, so he didn’t find the right moment yet to come out to him. Maybe he would in, let’s say, eighty years, or something around that number.

“O well, he seems to be a pretty dedicated friend when it comes to you. Can you tell me some things he did for you?” Leslie continued asking.

“He did so much! He apologized to Buffy for being… not nice earlier, just so he could be friends with me. And he broke up with his other friends for me. And he said I was the only one he could talk to. And you know, the challah? He didn’t buy that, he baked it himself! And he’s always smiling when he sees me. And sometimes, when I’m in a rush, he buys me a muffin, because I like them so much!”

Leslie leaned back a bit. She didn’t expect her son to be that level of smitten. It also didn’t sound like TJ didn’t like Cyrus. Quite the opposite actually.  
“Wow…, that’s impressive. That doesn’t sound like someone who doesn’t like you back, to be honest. But what happened with the costumes then?”

Cyrus laid his head on his hands. “I don’t know really. He asked me to do the costume together, looking all excited, and then we ran into Kira. And the next day he showed up not dressed up as he promised, and I looked like a lunatic.”

Leslie frowned. “Hm, strange. That seems out of character. Tell me something about that girl Kira. Is she nice?”

Cyrus scoffed. “If by ‘nice’ you mean ‘mean’, ‘poisonous’ and ‘manipulative’, then yes.”

“I see”, Leslie continued, “And how did TJ look when you two saw each other at school this morning?”

It was Cyrus’s turn to frown. “Uhm…, let me think, I think he looked sad and guilty, I guess?”

Leslie beamed at the boy. “Ah, you see, this is all good news!”

Cyrus looked at his mother as if she had gone mad. “What do you mean ‘good news’?”

“Dear, it’s obvious TJ made a bad decision. We all make bad decisions from time to time. It makes us human. Do you know what the number one reason for making bad decisions is?”

“No?”, Cyrus said, listening carefully to his mother, and also his therapist for a bit at this moment.

“Fear, honey. Fear makes us do the most stupid things. Most bad decisions originate from a feeling of fear.”

Cyrus processed the words his mother was saying. Although it sounded sensible, he couldn’t imagine how it fitted his situation with TJ.  
“But TJ fears nothing! I have never seen him afraid of anything at all!”

“Everyone is afraid of something, Cyrus. And maybe I can imagine what that something is in TJ’s case.”

“Really? What?” Cyrus asked sitting completely upright now.

“Okay dear. Let’s imagine TJ not having any feelings for you at all. Let’s imagine him being the most straight person in the world.”

“Uhm…, okay, that’s what I already thought anyway…”

“But if that’s the case, then there would have been no good reason to back out of the costume with you. You just explained how much of a good friend he is to you, and how unlikable Kira is. And you told me he was excited about the costume with you, and he looked sad together with Kira. Am I right?”

“Yes, I think so. But he _did_ back out of the costume with me.”

“Yes he did. Now, can you think of something that our manipulative Kira could have said to him, that would have made him back out of a couples costume with you? Let’s be honest, it’s a bit of a couple’s thing to do. Could she have said something that could have scared him off?”

Cyrus looked at his mother with wide eyes, as he experienced an epiphany. “O my god, she saw us together, and TJ was touchy with me as he always is. He had his arm around me when we walked away. You don’t think she told him he would look gay with me if we were to do a costume together?”

Leslie nodded her head. “That’s exactly what I think is the best explanation.”

“That doesn’t mean he’s gay and he likes me back.”

“True”, Leslie said, “But it’s a far more likely option than him being straight and not liking you. If TJ doesn’t like you, and isn’t gay, there’s no real threat in looking gay with another boy. Then it’s just good fun and everyone can laugh about it. It’s 2019, there’s no reason to act all uptight about it. However…, if TJ _is_ gay, then it’s a big threat if someone says you will be outed against your will, and to lose the control about who knows and when. And that feeling is even strengthened if he does like you. Because then he faces the risk of you finding out his feelings about you, without him being ready to tell you.”

Cyrus was thinking hard now. It all made so much sense when you thought about it properly. He suddenly felt a wave of sympathy for TJ. “O wow, I would have found that completely terrifying! Poor TJ! Do you really think that’s how it is?”

Leslie put her hand on Cyrus wrist, squeezing it a little bit. “We can’t be one hundred percent sure. But I think it is a very plausible explanation. For now I think you should give him some time to think. He probably knows he messed up, and if he cares for you he will realize he hurt you. I’m guessing he will reach out for you somewhere over the next days. If he doesn’t…, make sure you get him to talk, and make him feel safe. Okay?”

Cyrus leaned back in his chair as he breathed out slowly. It sure was a lot to process, but a sparkle of hope was once more ignited in him.  
He nodded and smiled at his mother. “Okay, thank you mom. That was really helpful. Sorry for borrowing the colander without asking.”

Leslie got up from the table, smiling warmly at her son. “That’s alright dear. But next time you need a kitchen item to use on TJ, just ask me.”

“Jeez mom, you can’t say things like that”, Cyrus exclaimed, looking bright red.

“Well, if you ever need a therapy session to talk about it, you know where to find me. Love you son!”

Cyrus groaned hiding his face behind his hands. Embarrassment aside, he felt eternally grateful for his mother’s advice. He felt hopeful that everything would turn out okay in the end. And he was sure he would sleep much better this night than he had anticipated earlier that day.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't hesitate to leave a comment!  
> #lovewins


End file.
